The Messy Life

If I wrote a book it might be titled “The Messy Life of a Former Perfectionist”. I absolutely adore an organized, clean house. I’m one of those people who get super stressed when there are dishes in my sink, messes on my floor, etc. I can’t help it, it just happens; my heart rate goes up and I find myself running around the house cleaning up after everyone. I’m pretty sure it’s a curse. I think it’s my mom’s fault. Haha!

Having a clean house just makes me feel better and more relaxed… anyone else? (even here in this picture, though, the blinds are bugging me that they aren’t open all the way, ugh.)

Before you stop inviting me over because your house is messy, let me explain. I only feel this way when it is MY mess to clean! I’m actually jealous if you don’t feel the way I do, and I appreciate it! No judgement here!

This all being said, I think God wanted me to try to get over this feeling of wanting things to be perfect. Is it about control? Do I want to control everything in my environment? I don’t know. So I am learning to let go. It’s a process. BK (before kids) and even just BT (before twins) when I had just the 2 boys, I would have a sparkling clean house, I would bake and cook a lot, and I would make sure my boys were almost always well-behaved, especially when we went out.

Did I have too much pride in that? Hmm, possibly.

Now I have the 4 boys and our oldest now has special needs (we did not know this years ago because it is a progressive disease, when he was young he acted as a “typical” child.) Believe me when I tell you, I AM A CHANGED WOMAN!

Ha! So long, Adios, Goodbye to the old perfectionist me!

Not really because I decided to change. It was forced on me. But I am grateful! I am grateful that I will never ever ever judge any mom for anything ever! I am grateful that I know what it feels like to struggle with my kids. I’m grateful for learning to let go of things that are not important! I am so grateful to know, really know, what the most important things in life are!

The important things

Although, I do have to remind myself sometimes that instead of doing the dishes, I really just need to sit and read to my 2 year old. Instead of cleaning everyones messes, I need to let the kids do it, imperfectly. Instead of getting super stressed when they make a huge mess, embrace it and play with them! I will be honest with you, this is a hard lesson for me! I am still learning.

Nothing in my life is perfect anymore! HAHA! I don’t say that in a complain-y way. I find it a bit funny actually! Wait, that’s not quite right. Our family’s love for each other is perfect, and the way God put us all together is perfect. God’s love for us is perfect. God’s timing is perfect. But other than that, my life is perfectly IMPERFECT!

It’s ironic that now when I go out with my kids, there will undoubtedly be shouting, crying, and just the basic what-looks-like bad behavior. I’m learning not to care. (Although, now-a-days it’s been some time since I’ve actually taken them anywhere in public.) My house is almost always messy. I’m learning not to care. I only cook a couple times a week now. My husband is learning not to care.

Letting it go like Elsa. That perfect girl is gone!

Ok now it’s stuck in my head

So moral of the story… a messy life is a good life when you make sure to pay attention to the important things.

I’m going to leave you with a compilation of pictures I have taken over the last week or so. Like I said, our oldest son, Liam, has special needs (Sanfilippo Syndrome- if you haven’t read previous posts) and he literally makes messes and gets into things he shouldn’t EVERY. SINGLE. SECOND that I turn my head. So, here you go, and this is only a tiny look into our days. Welcome to my messy life.

Placed a nice chunk of playdough into my coffee. I was putting Tobey in for a nap.

made breakfast for everyone! ok, this one is pretty sweet! I was still in bed. it was EARLY.

bringing all the cereal into our bed at the crack of dawn. Cutie! I was (again) still in bed.

poured ALL of the half-and-half that I had just bought into this dirty batter bowl. I was using the bathroom.

putting some money he found into my husband’s boots. I was making lunch for everyone.

poured a bunch of cereal on my bedroom floor at 6:00am. I was (yep) in bed.

again with the cereal. I was changing the twin’s diapers.

and… poured all of the salt into the playdough. I was putting Oliver in for a nap.

Ooohhhh I love him!

Let the storm rage ooooon, the cold doesn’t bother me anyway….. sorry.